WHITBY NOW: PART TWO, SATURDAY NIGHT

. Please keep your eye on Popwatch for further Whitby Now 2008 developments. Thanks.
I
After Friday night's brain frazzling (in a good way) lineup of eleven bands, Saturday was a little more relaxed and a bit less jumping-abouty. That's not to say it wasn't exciting, no by Jimmimy its not!
I
There was a varied assortment of styles to savour. Get yourself a plastic glass of beer, just to make it more realistic, and settle down to read the following retelling of Saturday's events. It'll be like you're there all over again.
I
It was a bit nippy on Saturday night. Brass monkeys weather, and I followed Tania Rodway and her companion down the steps. She was saying how nervous she felt. I had no idea what to expect from her, but I knew she'd be alright.
I
On entering the hall after braving the freezing north wind outside, I took a seat, removed my socks and shoes and warmed my feet in the radiantly dulcet tones of Mr Mark Liddell, the singer of THE WHITBY NOW BAND. Unfortunately a steward made me put my footwear back on, and now I'm being sued by several audience members due to an outbreak of athlete's foot that has subsequently spread like wildfire across Whitby.
I
After performing a top notch song written partly by Jean Scales (she kept that one quiet!), Mark proceeded to present to the audience his small, but perfectly formed (wait for it!) ukulele. Then Mark, Paul, Nige, and Si did a magnificently satirical "song about Whitby and Scarborough" that caught everybody unexpectedly, like a seagul dropping a fish-head into your duffle coat hood. It really has to be heard to be appreciated. I'll get it up on this blog as soon as I can. I loved it, me. Cock on!
I
ALEX KIRBY was introduced by James Wales as one of the best singer-songwriters ever to come out of Whitby, and you can't argue with the man. He seems completely comfortable onstage, and his between song chats are conducted as if you're sitting with him in his front room.
I
I'm not suggesting for one minute that his front room is as big as an aircraft hangar, with formica tables, uncomfortable chairs and a bar in the corner, but you get the picture.
I
He did a song about letting people wear his hat, and I'm sure he did one about domestic pets too, where he was asking a lady if he could play with her puppies for a bit. Nice to know there are still some gentlemen around who are also kind to animals.
I
Cult musician, guitar god and part time shop assistant CARL ROBINSON strapped on his axe (as I believe they're called in certain circles) and, more than ably assisted by his band, Hey Presto! Suddenly he was the reincarnation of Jimi Hendrix. Except with a considerably neater haircut.
I
He dedicated his set to drummer Mitch Mitchell, the last remaining member of The Jimi Hendrix Experience, who died on November 12th.
I
'Hey Joe' and 'Foxy Lady' were all present and correct, and of course the audience weren't happy until they'd been well and truly Purple Hazed. Of course he played it behind his head in the time honoured Hendrix fashion, but here's a tip Carl; next time floss before going onstage. Doing it with your guitar strings during solos is just plain unhygeinic.
I
'Scuse me while I kiss the hem of his checked shirt.
I
HIGH TIDE sounded great. Normally when they do small venues they sit down, and I also like it when the guy who plays with them does his fabulous minimal box percussion. However, this time they had a band, and I think it was the same guy on drums.
I
Our music teacher at school always used to tell us that you had to stand up to sing properly. Something about chest expansion and your diaphragm, and there were no stools in sight tonight. Liam has a superb voice, perfectly suited to Jack's guitar playing as it languidly unfolds and gently wraps itself around his words. Their sublety remained resolutely intact.
I
The other thing our music teacher (Mr Jackson) used to tell us was to look after our voices. "Gargle regularly with honeydew and speak only in a whisper, lest one's vocal cords should become dislodged". Words of wisdom of course, unless you're a blues singer, in which case drink bourbon, smoke tabs, shout at your good-for-nothing woman who done gone treated you wrong, then smoke another tab and drink a bit more bourbon.
I
So that's what Luke Pearson did before forming SACK THE JUGGLER, and consequently he's got the perfect blues voice. He must have really worked at it.
I
A four piece unit with Jamie Simpson, William Barber and Stephen Johnson on guitar, drums and bass respectively, Sack The Juggler kicked what can only be described as some ass.
I
Its one thing to be technically proficient, but Luke clearly feels this music coursing through his veins, and it shows. Nerves and sinews are stretched to breaking point to keep notching up that righteous passion just a little bit more. Then a bit more. Then a bit more. How long before the pressure cooker explodes all over the kitchen?
I
We'll not find out tonight, because at Whitby Now once your 25 minutes is up, you're off. (That's if you' were playing on the Saturday night of course, because due to unforseen circumstances all everyone was allowed to do an extra five minutes. On Friday, 20 minutes and that was your lot Sonny Jim!
I
Most of the people performing at Whitby Now have been around in various combinations playing gigs and generally popping up here and there about town, but what about TANIA RODWAY? I'd seen her on Jean's friends page and she came highly recommended by Mr Liddell. Mind you having a burger in one hand, a pint in the other and a fag in your gob is highly recommended by Mr Liddell, so that doesn't necessarily count for much.
I
As floor manager Kate Longmate, who kept proceedings running to time with the accuracy of a Space Shuttle launch, led Tania onstage, I was wondering whether her Whitby Now debut would be a nervy affair for the raven haired chanteuse.
I
I needn't have fretted. Once Tania hit her stride there was no stopping her. She kicked off with Ironic, the Alanis Morrisette song. When she hit one of the high notes, my glass actually shattered - and it was made of plastic!
I
A perfect contrast from Luke's searing anguished voice, Tania's notes were as clear and focussed as laser beams. Her set included Duffy's Warwick Avenue, a Eurythmics song, and I think one by Aretha Franklin, correct me if I'm wrong though.
I
We all fell in love with her. She said it was better than sex. I don't know, I can't remember that far back.
I
I spoke to Leafy before she went on with THE DTS, and now she actually believes she can perform photosynthesis. I think she must have been sitting under a bright light all day, because she had energy coming out of her ears, the lass.
I
They had their special electronic drum kit thingy onstage, and Leafy pouted, preened and vogued her way through 25 minutes of popular hits. In a frilly skirt, red tights and a bowler hat she ushered people up on the dancefloor to strut their stuff and fight for their right to party.
I
LOKI took to the stage with singer Paul 'Loki' Locker flanked on either side by Chris 1 and Chris 2. The fourth member of the band, Rodge appeared to be a small metallic looking electronic gizmo on a tripod in the background that Chris 1 was in charge of fiddling with.
I
Prior to their appearance, the DJs played Stone Roses and Happy Mondays tunes, and they were spot on. Paul has that swagger and confidence and the sheer energy of the music generates excitement in bucketfuls.
I
People took to the dancefloor spontaneously and it was like The Hacienda except by the sea and with cheaper drinks. Anthony H Wilson would have signed them up in a flash. I loved the one about MySpace. Brilliant subject.
I
After several tentative attempts, Paul finally mounted one of the wobbly monitor speakers and jumped offstage mingling with the dancers, and at one point swung his microphone round with such enthusiasm that it flew off the end of the cable forcing him to scurry across the dancefloor to retrieve it.
I
Loki, play Whitby more often! We love you. As Tania says, when is the LP out?
I
On Saturday, for one night only, The Forefathers became THE GOREFATHERS. Giant skulls were mounted on the speaker stacks at either side of the stage glowering out at the audience with seemingly evil intent to set the mood for the proceedings.
I
The Gorefathers turned up sporting crudely fashioned sack masks and it was time once again to accept a dose of medication from our resident rock doctors.
I
Great handfuls of maggots were thrown out into the audience from a bucket on the drum podium in keeping with the horror themed shenanigans. I bet it seemed funny at the time, but let's see who's laughing next year, when we turn up at Whitby Now 2009 and the place is buzzing with flies.
I
It always looks hard playing drums and singing, but Steve 'Controversial' Scott did superbly well to pull it off. He did vow never ever to play drums for The Forefathers again though. Shame, but possibly good news for any drummers looking for a job.
I
So it was all over in a cacophanous flurry of sackcloth and rock medicine. Two nights of absolutely amazing local talent that ran like clockwork from beginning to end. Everyone involved
should be immensely proud of themselves for what they've given to Whitby. I can't wait for next year.
I
The only sad thing was that our good friend Mr Horne couldn't be there, but we were with him and his family all the way. See you next year Jon.
I